Jul 26, 2006

I'm a beautiful flower, damnit.

A) When I'm having an intelligent discussion, don't dare toss in something about my faith and religion and beliefs and lifestyle because it's a "thing to do" or it seems like a "quirky way" to win the fight. It kills a discussion becuase I have to defend myself, when I shouldn't have to. In fact, I'm going to stop defending myself because anyone who thinks this is just a "phase" or thinks that I'm young and will "grow out of it" or that this isn't who I "used to be" ... isn't worth my time. OK?
B) I'm not morbidly obese. Don't ever tell me that I am.

I don't feel like I should spend my entire life defending who I am. I know that because I'm "different" it means I'll be "resident expert" on the topic. It's a reason I sort of hope to make aliyah. I don't want to have to explain myself anymore. Not only to nonJews, but to Jews as well. The rabbi and I never got to talk about these things. I read the books, I read online. My confidence is solid, but sometimes ... sometimes I lose myself when people tell me it's a "hobby" or that it's "just a phase."

FERSHTAY? -- In Yiddish, "do you understand?"
Hineni! -- In Hebrew. Moses said, "Here I am."

I made two videos today. Silent videos set to musical backdrops (including Rilo Kiley's "The Frug" and the theme to Triplets of Belleville) that includes a wacky homeless man dancing to some big band music. They can be found on my YouTube account. I also found my new haunt (which is mentioned in the video, though I just realized I neglected to include the photo in the video ... bollocks!). It's a cool joint open super late and is right on the D2, which goes all day from Dupont to Glover Park (where I reside). I only wish I had found it sooner. I realized while sitting and reading, people around me were sitting at tables covered in papers and books and I remembered what I want: Education. I want to be busy and full with work and school again. Indefinitely, preferably. I just need to get there.

(Oh, and that flower photo was taken by me, two days ago on Tunlaw Road.)


Christy said...

Ha! Love the videos! Made me smile. Sorry, can't help with the camera. (Don't even have my own unless you count the one installed in my computer.)

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