Chanukah: 2003-Now

A Novel Idea Bookstore, Lincoln, NE || 2011

Back in 2003, at the urging of a friend, I went to A Novel Idea Bookstore -- my third favorite used bookstore of all time after Myopic in Chicago and the Antiquarium in Brownsville, NE -- and down the rickety stairs to this section pictured above: Judaica. It was there that I first bought Choosing a Jewish Life by Anita Diamant, and it was in front of this shelf of used books that my neshama arose from a weary sleep. The fire continues to burn bright, its shades of orange and red and yellow and amber waxing and waning each day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eight years ago, the first night of Chanukah fell on December 20; it was a Saturday. At that time, I wrote a lot about my dislike for Christmas and how it made me feel, and I kvelled about probably the first "Jewish" gift ever given to me, by my friend Melanie. It was a musical dreidel. I was a sophomore in college in Lincoln, Nebraska, and I knew I would be Jewish.

Seven years ago, the first night of Chanukah fell on December 7. By that point, I was a Jewish knowledge and observance machine. On December 6, I hopped on a city bus and schlepped over to a Walgreens near the Reform synagogue in order to buy my first menorah. It was a huge, important, ridiculous event for me. The next day, on the first day of Chanukah, I wrote:

Happy Hanukkah everyone! I bought my menorah, lit my candles, said my blessings, and then made some cookies that are shaped like driedels, megandavids, Judah Maccabee, shields, etc. Then I iced them, sprinkled them with blue and yellow sprinkles and brought them down to work. They were literally gone in about 5 minutes. Everyone crowded around them ... it was an amusing sight. Interestingly enough, though, I recieved an e-mail from DAN, the PRES of HILLEL, at 5:45 (though I didn't get it till tihs evening) that they will be lighting a menorah in the J.D. Edwards Kaufman building (where just about every Jew on campus lives ... the "super honors program") each night of Hanukkah. ... Although I don't have the blessing memorized ... mrr. They know I'm a Jew-in-training anyhow. Heh. Did I mention that my Jews in the Modern World prof (Alan Steinweis) played the VIDLIT Yiddish lesson in class today. Oh man ... it was hilarious. I think I enjoyed it more than the rest of the class. Then again, I have a passion for the Yiddish. 

On December 9, 2004, I wrote:

Tonight, after lighting candles with Dan, Cliff and Sari in Kauffman hall ... I definately felt a part of something there with them. Lonely Jews in Nebraska, ha. But Dan sang the blessing beautifully ... Sari lit the candles, and Cliff and I stared on. It was good times.

Shortly thereafter I started working on a paper on why I want to be Jewish for the then-rabbi of the synagogue who subsequently left. I waited another nine months for another rabbi to work with me, and by then I'd mastered so much. I converted Reform in April 2006 and in December 2006 I was in Washington D.C. for Chanukah; I made this video and wrote a lot of blog posts. 

Back in 2007, Chanukah was incredibly awesome, and then Christmas came and it was bad. A little old man accosted me while I was busy at work at the Spertus Museum's open house for Jews on Christmas. If you want to read it, I think it can give you some insight into what it's like to be a non-Orthodox convert.
And then? From 2008 up until last year, I was in Israel for Chanukah. It was a unique, mind-boggling experience where I felt so much like myself. No Christmas tunes, no expectations, just lots of latkes and sufganiyot and chanukiot everywhere. Walking up and down alleyways, menorahs dotted doorways and boxes outside of homes, parks and squares, restaurants even stopped what they were doing to light. In Israel, Chanukah feels right. In America? It feels strange. 
Perhaps it's because for the first time in so many years I'm back where I began, in Lincoln, Nebraska. Estranged from my mother, without a chanukiah, no latkes, no sufganiyot, nowhere to go. So for the sake of memory, I think, I might go over to that same Walgreens where I purchased my first chanukiah and buy another. Maybe when I get home I'll make Chanukah cookies or try out this Gluten-Free Sufganiyot recipe, but at least I'll be there with my chanukiah and my Jewish troll doll and all of my Judaica and my sunrise over the desert in Israel. 
It all began while I was living in Lincoln -- my Jewish journey, that is -- but it never stopped here, and I think that I've worn away all the memory that's here. 

Go Chabad! Go!

Chabad is rocking my world today. I mean ROCKING my world today.

I was down in the Loop in search of a hat. I have a large head, short hair, and well, those two just don't mesh. So I bought some gloves, and after Target and Macy's, I quit searching, bought a Earl Grey Vanilla Latte and called it a night. So as I'm walking to the El, here comes a pickup truck playing music really loud, sort of cruising. As it got closer ...

It was a Chabad-sponsored pickup truck with a menorah on the back! Yes, the shamash and the first two candles were lit and music was a'playin' as two yarmulke-toting fellows in the cab. It made me smile, big.

Then I got home and found the Chabad.org e-mail highlighting the site's special items for Chanukah, including a facebook.com application! Hot dog! So the first thing I did when I got home? I sent out Chanukah cards to my Jewish friends (lookout, folks!).

Tonight my plan is to take it easy, once again. I went to bed last night at 9 p.m. because of a horribly depressing day at work. Today I'm feeling a little better, but still not quite level, disallowing me from enjoying the well-lit holiday. But the moving menorah and the various menorahs spotting windows along Broadway Street on the way home have brightened my spirit and kept me from feeling incredibly isolated this year (if you recall, last year I went to the National Menorah Lighting near the White House -- also sponsored by Chabad -- with latkes, even!).

My plan for tomorrow is to make some latkes, some Chanukah cookies (that is, cookies in Jewish shapes iced with Jewish colors!), some sufganiyot and other goodies. Expect the step by steps as I've done with other holidays. It's my way of sharing my Chanukah with you!

Menorah addiction!

As it turns out, I'm going to be in Baltimore for a few nights of Chanukah to help my friend Heather celebrate her being a newlywed (a hearty mazel tov to her and her husband!). So I went to the store today and picked up my THIRD menorah! Yes, folks, I bought a mini "travel" menorah. It's no bigger than the size of my hand (which I hear is tiny) and has little birthday cake-style candles to go with it! I'm super stoked that I'll get to celebrate a few nights with my good friend! And buying menorahs? It's addictive!

Here we go ....

This is me testing the idea of video blogging :)

Chanukiah: Super sized!

So I finally got the video from my cellphone sent to myself. It's a 10-second clip, but I think it expresses the mood of the National Menorah lighting that I went to Sunday. I put it together in this little movie with some other photos from the event and from this evening. The picture in the final clip is a little music box my mom got me for Chanukah that plays the dreidel song. Thanks, mom!

Chanukah: In the beginning ...

Tonight begins Chanukah. Festival of Lights. Many eves of dreidels and gelt and latkes. Applesauce and sour cream. Potlucks? Family? I'm missing the last two there. Unfortunately, I'm missing most of those things in the eve. For I work most of the nights of Chanukah. The newspaper life wasn't meant for me. I could make it work, sure. But I'd have to make it work without Shabbat (as I do now, and yes, a play on words), and that's something I'm tired of sacrificing.

But for now, Chanukah, this holiday of yore and splendid celebration of our people. Did I mention the building's electric menorah sits RIGHT behind my desk? I was worried for a while because the Christmas tree went up, but no sign of the menorah. Then, after my days off I came in and BAM! It's worn, too. One of the bulbs is falling out of the socket, and I have my suspicious as to whether it will even turn on once plugged in.

I have complete and full intentions to blog as much as possible throughout the week on this holiday, mostly because I am not as close to it as I would like to be. Raised in a household of the golden rule and Santa Claus and the christmas tree, there wasn't much about Jesus or G-d or anything associated with the holiday. So I sort of have an advantage, I suppose. I have a menorah at home that I bought at a Walgreens back in Nebraska two years ago. It is silver and covered in leftover wax from my past two Chanukahs. I bought colorful candles this year at CVS and have full intentions of laying down the foil tonight, to prepare. Even though I won't be home to light the candle at the sun's down, I'll light the menorah when I get home, most assuredly.

My intention for tomorrow is to get up, head to the store for some food coloring or sprinkles and then make sugar cookies shaped like menorahs, the Maccabees, dreidels and magen Davids. I bought the cookie cutters a few years ago and last year made the cookies for my coworkers at the college press, so I figure I've got something going here. My Chanukah will be filled with dozens of festive sugar cookies. Hopefully, someday, I'll be the bubbe with the cookies. Lots of them.

So how do I want to begin the holiday? Firstly with a tidbit on what Chanukah is about (for those out there unaware, then a bit on the menorah (inspired by a friend's query) and then by some thoughts from Rabbi David Zeller, the founder of the Shevet Center for Jewish Spirituality and Medidation in Jerusalem.

1) In a nutshell, Chanukah celebrates a miracle for the Jewish people -- both religiously and militarily. Now, the military side of the miracle isn't really emphasized that much, but it's significant because it is what set the lights rolling. The Maccabees, who were religious, were enraged at the defiling of the Temple and restrictions on the Jews, rebeled and reclaimed the Temple. Much of the battle was considered the work of miracles because the Maccabees were far outnumbered, of course. They cleaned and rededicated the temple in 164 BCE and set the ner Tamid (Eternal Flame) aflame with the only bit of purified oil that was left, but realized they only had enough to keep it lit for a single day before more purified oil could be gotten. But the lamp stayed lit for eight days -- a true miracle on top of everything else, wouldn't you say?

Perhaps the greatest thing about Chanukah is that it is a time to bring light to the world when it is at its darkest (think about how dark it gets so early now!) in wintertime. It's about renewal, just as the Temple was renewed. It's about putting forth light from amid the darkness, finding all the greatness amid the darkness.

2) A friend e-mailed me today asking what the difference is between a menorah with 7 branches and a menorah with 9 branches. So for those of you who have seen both and know not the difference, here you are: The menorah commanded by G-d to be lit each day in the days of the Temple had six branches and one stem for the seven days of the week. These are often seen in synagogues today, and my shul back home in Nebraska had two electric ones that flanked the bimah, and each Shabbat they were turned on. The seven-posted menorah has many rules and regulations regarding what it can and cannot be made of, etc. The menorah that is most commonly seen and is associated with Chanukah borrows from the original menorah, of course, and has eight branches and one stem, which is for the shamash. The shamash is the candle lit that serves as the "worker," in that it is used to light the other candles, which represent the miracle of the oil that lasted for eight days. Ta da!

And finally ...

2) Rabbi Zeller has said that Chanukah is "one of the most mystical of holidays, because it comes out of the oral tradition," rather than from Torah. Additionally, he says, "The deepest secrets are contained in this holiday. It carries a tremendous power."